I decided to jump to this principle when I had a couple of good ideas in the shower.
I have been drinking quite a lot of Cava recently. When I applied Beyond Chocolate principles to my alcohol use, everything changed and I was comfortable with myself in that area for the first time in years. I don't create rules for myself any more, I just follow my instinct. This means that most days I have some wine of some kind, although I often don't and not because of any rules. So, I realised this morning that I am still feeling the slightly tight feeling in my head that I get when I am dehydrated. So I decided to do more of the things that hydrate my body and less of the things that dehydrate. That was it - no firm rules, no commitment or timescales. Just that decision without pressure.
My digestive system tends to be quite slow and without giving TMI, I need to keep it moving. Lately I haven't been eating as much veg as usual and it has had an effect. So, I decided to make smoothies in the mornings to get a couple of pieces of fruit into me before the day starts. For some reason, I just can't be bothered to eat fruit most of the time. Drinking it is a lot less effort!
So, two ideas under my belt I started my day. It did not go as I expected and I ended up spending the whole morning supporting friends and ex-clients with their problems. This was just where I want to be, and I was happy to do it. However, it left me with no time to do what I had intended, which is a source of stress for me. My first thought was to abandon my plans to go to knitting group this afternoon to do the things I hadn't done, but then I decided that I needed some time for me so I went. I regretted it on the way as I felt so tired driving and could have had a nap at home, but I did enjoy it and it was good to do something for myself.
The rest of the day went very pear-shaped and I ended up extremely stressed and unhappy. I decided to do the things I needed to do and leave as much as possible till tomorrow. I have just been up to my youngest who appears to have wet her bed quite deliberately, while sitting up. I ended up so angry with her that I have come down and cut myself off from the rest of humanity until I can be trusted to be nice.
There is so much going on for us at the moment and a big will we/won't we thing is hanging over us, making plans and expectations very fluid, which is not a comfortable place for me to be in. I can see what is happening and I am going to scale back everything I can. I will make sure I make time for me and what I want to do, and be good to myself. I ate tons earlier and it felt like a binge but I don't even feel too full now so I guess it wasn't as bad as it seemed at the time.
So, what have I learned?
- that I have some great ideas and that framing them in BC speak, without pressure or judgement, makes them much easier to work with. (I haven't had any alcohol today and I know I won't, but not because I shouldn't)
- that I need to work out why I am getting so stressed and take appropriate action
- that I need to remember that just because I planned to do something, doesn't mean that it needs to be done today. When something happens to change my plans, I can reprioritise.
It's 'stop when you are satisfied' tomorrow. I am looking forward to that one as it's one of the hardest things for me.
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